Being Detached

​Being Detached.

This word is the best way to describe me life since 2015. Don’t get me wrong, making friends isn’t hard. Actually it is really easy to make friends because most of share a commonality of being transient. However, even with the internet most of it seems at times to be temporary which is very hard to accept.

One of the beauties of traveling is that you are who you are in that moment. Traveling helps to keep things pure. There is no past to hold you back or and most of my future worries are about money and how to keep going. Shit like your reputation which you cultivate over the years are home don’t mean shit. Once you leave home, those opinions and that part of you ceases to exist -- for all intrinsic purposes anyway. It is both frightening and thrilling. You literally have the chance to reinvent yourself however you see fit. However, I personally think it is important to stay true to myself. I try my best to continue to be a better person.
Leaving home for a long period of time is starting to feel “right”. I’m getting use to the patchy internet, the language barriers, and the array of different personalities. The food and culture never disappoints and only gets better as I learn more and venture further off the beat and path. Nothing is free but the feeling is freeing.

Its so easy to hide from the “real” world because you are constantly navigating a gray area. The “real” world issues of home are no longer yours to bare everyday and the issues of the country where you are not yours to shoulder. Although you are emotionally attached to both places you are still an outsider or gringo. You are out of the loop both at home and aboard. You hear about things sometimes way after they happen at home-if at all and you don’t have any power to do anything besides volunteering in the country you are visiting. Day to day issues seem almost trivial and temporary which seem to be a gift and curse. Everything really boils down to perception and timing.

If it wasn’t for my job, I wouldn't know what day it is. Actually since my job requires me to work on weekends and nights I do sometimes loose track. At times I really do miss having a weekly routine. At times I try to create a semblance consistency. It’s in our nature to have some sort of routine. I think that we find comfort in knowing what’s going to happen. However, A life worth living can’t be lived only in your comfort zone in my opinion.  

If you’ve ever gone away for a few weeks, you know the feeling that I’m trying to convey. People you’ve only met for a few days become your best friends. You can’t imagine how you survived without knowing them. You have trouble remembering life before you got there.
Being in the cruising community magnifies events more than I can express. When you spend hours upon days with the same people -- relationships escalate. One week of time feels like months of real time. This is neither a positive nor a negative thing, but an observation—something I’ve only recently started to contemplate.

I also realized that it is extremely hard when its time to say goodbye. The bond that you create with the people you meet become more than just a friend.  Some of which you share life threatening or altering moments. Within a matter of days or weeks its time to sail in two different directions. I hope that its really a, “See you later", but I know that we all have our own busy lives.

In some ways detachment is positive because it makes the hurt less when you have to leave or they leave.  However, the thing about detachment, in any case, is that it’s a double-sided sword. Yeah, you limit the risk and hurt you may feel, but it can also limit the full range of an emotional bond available to you.

Every weekend is someone’s last weekend. You start feeling sad, and acutely aware that in this case you could literally never see this person again. It was mere coincidence that you were both in the same place at the same time to begin with, right?

After that first chance encounter friendship and relationships takes work, from both sides to stay in touch. You hope that Facebook or Instagram will bridge the distance even if only to see that they are doing great.

I agree things can’t stay the way they are. For better or worse. But that isn’t any reason to not enjoy the present. Never let the knowledge that tomorrow things might not be perfect prevent you from enjoying things while they are—The gift

People know that their time together is short and that things can’t last so they try and take advantage of every moment they can. This goes for friendships, relationships, excursions, and even parties. They understand that happiness can be fleeting, so they enjoy it whenever they can. I have learned to celebrate the “small victories” because sailing you become quickly isolated. Life is all about the little things.
 
Everyday I try to learn to fight for the people that try to stay in touch with me. I hope that my blog and video’s serve as a reminder to them of how important they are to the journey. I know that I have some truly great family and friends. Some I’ve known for years, others for only a few days or weeks. Regardless of the length of our friendship or distance, they have made an effort to keep our friendship strong.
 
I want to thank all of you for making me feel connected. Being transient makes it hard to show that you really care about everyone. So once again, thank you all for helping me to try the keep the feeling of detachment away.